Paddling Through The Middle {By Michelle}

When people write about body image, weight, self-esteem I think back to my days of blogging and starting the Exposed Movement:


You see for the past 10+ years I have been on a mission to lose weight. I have successfully kept off around 90lbs.


I was lower at one point in my life, by about 40lbs, and I was spiritually freaking miserable.

How does being skinny = miserable?

Well, it’s all how you approach your weight loss and how much you respect your body. After getting to my lowest, I started to full.on.binge. Jars of almond butter, pans of brownies, puking in the shower. I was miserable. The weight crept on. Over 2 years I gained 40lbs.

During this time I started to think about my body. I started going to counseling to find my center of control, to find the spring in the step that I had lost…I went to find my spirit.


In our quest to become ‘thin’  in life and to HATE the way we look we hold our spirits in bondage. We sit, wallow, starve, over-exercise, and punish away the one thing that many of us are chasing..LIFE. LIVING!

I can’t say that there was an epiphany of sorts in my life. It wasn’t an over-night change, it was the slow progression of making peace with food. Making peace with the weight I was at and realising that I am more than a calorie, point, or pant size.

Three things which have helped in over-coming my issues with food, balance, and my weight:

  1. Admitting where I was, what was causing me to numb my pain
  2. Seeking help: Counseling, “Women Food and God”, “A Million Miles In A Thousand Years” and my faith
  3. Focusing on today..and ONLY today. Give each the best that you can give it.


The past two years have been exhausting and the most life-giving thing that I’ve done. I never refused to give up.

“The reward you get from a story is always less than you thought it would be, and the work is harder than you imagined. The point of a story is never about the ending, remember. It’s about your character getting molded in the hard work of the middle" ~ Donald Miller "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years"

~Michelle @


Thanks so much to Michelle for her inspiring words about loving ourselves no matter what size/shape we are. How we look doesn’t have to define us, and though we obsess about it, it’s not all of who we are. Remember to leave a comment to be entered for a pair of earrings to help you feel a little more lovely.



  1. Bari
    March 9, 2011 / 2:58 pm

    That was a beautiful post. Thank you to Michelle for sharing with us all.

  2. Brooke
    March 9, 2011 / 3:17 pm

    if only more of us could get there! also? haven't read that particular book by miller, but i loved Blue Like Jazz. I'm thinking this needs to be put on my reading list.

  3. Kassi @ Truly Lovely
    March 9, 2011 / 7:29 pm

    Awesome that you found a way to come to terms with it!! But still work to be in good shape! Thanks for sharing!

  4. MadScientist
    March 9, 2011 / 11:30 pm

    Thanks Ladies. Brooke…that book is amazing. I will re-read it again in my lifetime for sure.

  5. Anonymous
    March 15, 2011 / 8:06 pm

    So eloquent and real. Thanks for always being so open, Michelle.